Data from the American Bar Association shows women now outnumber men in law school attendance with over 51% of graduates being women. However, in 2018 women comprised only 19.5% of equity partners and 30.5% of nonequity partners (Cooper 2020). What is holding women back after law school?
Perhaps you have already figured out what your vision is, set your goals, and came up with the perfect plan to achieve them, but you are still not getting anywhere, or progress has stalled, and you feel stuck.
Chances are you have an underlying belief or thought that has been holding you back from actually doing the things you need to do to achieve your goals.
Try the following suggestions to work through your struggles so that you can figure out where that mental block or professional barrier is.
Own your circumstances & shed the guilt.
Do you feel you are always trying to strike a perfect balance between work and family but always fall short in one or the other? The constant balancing act can be exhausting and often times women struggle with balancing both and instead let go of one or the other.
Own up to your choices, but more importantly, own your circumstances which you do not have control of changing. Identify limiting beliefs that enter your mind. Do not fall into the trap of feeling constant guilt about being a “bad” mother, employee, wife, or colleague, especially in situations where you have had to prioritize what was most important in that moment. Set your priorities straight, but also allow yourself the possibility of failing once in a while.
Unchecked guilt and shame will ultimately hold you back from growth and reaching your full potential. You have several roles to play and with so much to do, no matter how much you try, you will end up leaving something behind once in a while. Do not hold yourself hostage to committing to every request that comes your way. Rather, avoid burnout and just accept that you are human by allowing yourself to make mistakes, to say no, and to even fall out of schedule occasionally.
Prioritize what needs your personal involvement and delegate when can be passed on to others.
Instead of holding back or backing out from your own professional growth all together, look for patterns in your shortcomings and ask for help. Women are often hesitant to call out for help even when we need it the most.
By holding back from seeking or accepting help you can put youself in situations where you are always stretching yourself more than you should. Move your budget around to prioritize additional childcare expenses, talk with your doctor about your mental health, train an employee or outsource a task you normally do, or ask a friend to run an errand for you. Bottom line, if you want a healthy work life balance you cannot do everything and be available 24/7.
Seeking help might make you feel vulnerable, but once you start practicing this important aspect of self-care you will find that the freed-up time is liberating and a win-win for all involved.
Asking for help creates new space, energy, and growth. You will have fewer distractions and more opportunities to strengthen relationships in your personal and professional life.
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Networking builds connections that help you move toward where you want to go professionally.
A woman who networks, gets work. There is power in networking and surprisingly, we are networking every day of our lives whether we realize it or not. A common misconception about networking is that its purpose is only about getting a job or selling something. In reality, networking can benefit you by building your support system, building your reputation, increasing your visibility, and discovering new ways to make you better at what you do.
Often when we are trying to make connections with people, we think it must be something big like an event space filled with hundreds of people, but they do not have to be huge events to make a difference. Sometimes that intimidating thought holds you back from your own professional development.
If networking is a big step out of your comfort zone, start with these two simple tips:
- Ask the people who you trust and already know in your professional circle where they network. If you have a warm introduction and a sense of what a new experience is going to be like, you’re likely to go in with calmed nerves. If your friend or colleague will go along with you, that is a helpful plus. The buddy system works wonders in these situations.
- Don’t just try one networking experience. Instead, try “sampling” a variety of networking experiences to see which are the best fit for you. For instance, if you find yourself drawn to events or workshops where you are going to learn about something specific that draws people with a similar interest, take advantage of the educational growth and potential connections you’ll find with individuals who share your interests.
When it comes to networking, there is also value in being intentional. Before you even go to any events, ask yourself questions like,
“What do I want to accomplish and what are my goals for this experience?”
“With whom would I like to connect?”
“What is my personality type?”
If you do not shine first thing in the morning, is it wise to sign up for a 7:30am networking group? Probably not. If you are somebody who wants to become known for your expertise, then look for networking opportunities that specialize in your area of expertise, rather than a random event where you are unsure of who will be there. Questions like these will help you make better use of your time away from the office and home and fine-tune what you are hoping to gain from each networking experience.
Share your wisdom. Let the world know what you are good at.
Self-promotion is rarely easy, but it is a solid step towards success. We cannot assume that people around us know what our strengths and talents are, or what we are capable of achieving unless we talk about it and showcase our expertise often.
If you want to be seen as a leader in your field, you have to stand up and vocalize what you have to offer. Whether you challenge yourself to chime in more during networking events, workshops, and team meetings, or make that phone call to a potential business lead, let your voice be heard. When your expertise helps the whole team, you become a valuable part of it. In turn, opportunities for growth and leadership roles within your firm are more likely to present themselves to you.
We helped one small firm reach #1fastet growing law firm on the Inc. 5000 list.
Identify institutional and societal barriers and combat them.
It can feel invalidating to be told that you need to speak up, shed the guilt and ask to share your wisdom without addressing the most pressing reason why women often struggle with advancing in their careers.
All too often, women come to the conclusion that we are just not quite “good enough” to fill the professional roles we so yearn for when the real issue is that the pipeline is clearly still broken. Because this experience is often hushed, we think it is our fault for not getting ahead. We think it is our fault for not asking for bigger salary raises, and we think it is our fault for not properly managing our heavy workloads while coordinating and undertaking childcare and familial responsibilities.
So many women are putting in the work, showing up and networking, and checking everything off that self-development list, but the obstacles are still present. What if instead of asking ourselves, “What is holding women back?” we recognize and step toward correcting gender bias in this profession by also asking questions like, “What workplace barriers are in place to keep women out or designed without women in mind?”
Unlock your true potential by identifying normalized systems and institutional barriers and combat them. If you are made to feel like a second-class citizen simply because you are a woman, push back. Do not hold yourself back or give up. The real problem lies in a world that in many ways cannot or flatly refuses to see a woman’s true value.
You cannot change everything, but what can change is your mindset.
A drowning man will pull you down with him. Meaning, you should never hang around environments that do not cultivate growth or people who do not aspire for the same goals as you do.
Sometimes overcoming hurdles that hold you back professionally comes down to realizing that what is not serving you is not, in fact, for you.
Your mindset is everything and if you have a toxic work environment, a boss or a business partner who is not in your corner challenging you to be your best self, while presenting you with opportunities for growth, cut ties with them. Find your people. And if you can’t find them, create your own environment and open doors for other women and men who empower your vision for success.
We’re cheering you on!
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Paloma DeHaan is a freelance writer and designer. She works closely with law firms to provide digital marketing content, ghostwriting, copywriting, and translation services that increases social media attention and search engine visibility. She enjoys motherhood and running a household, while creating content invaluable to professional service providers.
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